Potpourri for $100, Chairman…

"You suck!"

“You suck, sir.”

We have just a half-hour and lots of answers on the board. Let’s get to it…

“Political Bordellos” for $600…

Answer: An apparently compulsive liar who was exposed in a New York Times article for plagiarizing large portions of his master’s thesis at the Army War College, a revelation that probably won’t help his tight senatorial re-election bid (after being appointed to replace Max Baucus, who became the U.S. ambassador to China, yikes!). This pig of a former Army National Guard officer and Iraq War participant likely damaged his reputation further by blaming his alleged plagiarism on post-traumatic stress – a very real condition afflicting many thousands of honorable veterans.

Question: Who is Senator John Walsh of Montana? Correct!

“Rules of Engagement” for $1,000…

Answer: In land warfare, this is the more commonly used term referring to non-combatants positioned between warring parties during a conflict – when one party seeks to deter the other’s fire by hiding behind innocents. Other techniques include positioning snipers in houses of worship, hiding weapons and explosives caches in schools and hospitals, and firecapping rocket launchers in densely populated neighborhoods. Some of these tactics are brought to you today by Hamas in its narrative battle against Israel.

Question: What is a human shield? Correct. Or as Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu recently put it during his whirlwind Sunday talk show spin tour: “We’re using missile defense to protect our civilians, and they’re using their civilians to protect their missiles.”

Let’s go back to “Political Bordellos” for $800…

Answer: A legitimate activity for a rock star incumbent president during times of relative peace, less acceptable during global turmoil that includes fatal Russian military intervention in the Ukraine civil war, intensifying Chinese naval posturing in the Pacific, Iranian intransigence as it buys time to weaponize its nuclear program, the immigration crisis, a rising Caliphate in Iraq and Syria, and another Caliphate biding its time in Afghanistan.

Question: What is political fundraising? Correct! You’re on a roll…

How about “Who Puts This Shit on TV” for $1,000…

Answer: One of the worst shows on modern cable TV, sane people question mankind’s future every second it remains on the air.

Question: What is “Rizzoli & Isles?” Right again.

Let’s go to “Forgive My Poor Diction, But Death Row Ain’t Supposed to be Fun” for $600, please…

Answer: This Arizona Death Row inmate, who took two hours to die by lethal injection Wednesday, fatally shot his estranged girlfriend and her father two decades ago.

Question: What did Joseph Wood do to end up on Arizona’s Death Row? Right again…

“Who Puts This Shit on TV?” for $800… Hey, it’s a Daily Double!!

I’ll make it a true Daily Double.

Answer: Obscene to watch, like a train wreck, these cable news networks have poured fuel on a bonfire being fanned by anarchic liberals, loony conservatives and conspiracy theorists. Neutrality is a refugee in these newsrooms, where something called “wry commentary” has taken hold, like a viral infection.

Question: What are MSNBC and Fox News, and sometimes CNN?

Correct? You be the judge. I’m fair and balanced, so click on the above hyperlinks for some samples. For now, I’ll switch to PBS Newshour.

Question: Surely you can’t be serious?

Answer: I’m always serious. And don’t call me Shirley. See you at the next PBS pledge drive.


About Chairman Mao

I like fomenting socialist revolutions and purging my homeland of pseudo-intellectualism and capitalist dogma. I also like sports, dogs and food (although I wouldn't consider myself a foodie).
This entry was posted in Culture, Douchebags, Media, Politics, TV and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s